Christopher Blog

19) Where We Rest (6:21)

Been available several times since 1999

And here we are, the final song of `Orchid.’ The big payoff, so to speak. Everything leads up to this one final song.

It’s a personal favourite of mine. I’ve played it live several times throughout the years. Released it a few times over the years. The lyrics are self-explanatory. It’s devoid of the pomposity and ambition that belies the other songs.

Fun fact: This song was written first alongside `Entranced 1.0.’

Funner fact: This unintentional formula has been an ongoing thing (writing the first song and the last song at the same time) up to `Smoke and Origination.’

Memories:

I remember being in just my underwear while the drum loop played over and over again one gray morning. I sang out the words in the Orchid melody and it hasn’t changed since. I wonder if I ever put pants on that day.

I think I was really into the Ibiza `slow beats.’ I heard one around that time and thought I could do something with it.

Original `Where We Rest’ Version:

This is the original 4 track version. It has an extended outro which I wasn’t thrilled with. Aside from that, they’re fairly similar. I think the `final version’ that I have released throughout the years has better production and vocal performance.

In Closing

Well, my beauties, I hope you enjoyed the trip down my memory lane. It was a very critical look at a piece of music that at times has been mythologized and distorted over time. Perhaps I was very harsh on `Orchid.’ Perhaps I wasn’t harsh enough for some you out there with even more cynical leanings than I.

Either way, I am relieved that this thing is over, though it was an interesting experiment. It yanked out some rather ridiculous memories and it took too much time away from actually writing new material.

Tomorrow the whole album will be up to stream as one continual piece. So you can hear it seamlessly as it was meant to be heard.

Then the physical 2 CD set will be made available shortly thereafter. I have to wait on CDBaby to do the administrative set up. There will only be a few hard copies made. It will be available as an mp3 download as well.

Mastering audio is a horrid, horrid process. It takes a very special set of ears and perception to do this type of job. I do not have those ears. But since I am not budgeted for a proper mastering specialist, it’ll be DIY.

Mixing, with all its warts, algorithms, and soul sucking cubicle-esque methodology, is tolerable. There is a lot of room to play around and get creative.

Mastering? Hah. No. It’s about adding the polish to make the final recording sound vibrant and stellar. You know that glossy sheen you hear on your favourite songs that make it sound all professional? That’s mastering. Thankfully, the product I am working on is my own. If I was mastering someone else’s album, I probably would eat a bullet.

Mastering is also a deceptive and seductive mistress. With all the mastering software and outboard gear at your disposal, you can easily wreck a recording simply through making it incrementally louder and adding more eq. Each increment sounds glossier and louder than the previous step. Before you know it, you have this over-processed over-loud recording that is louder and harsher than any Brit Pop record.

The other deception is when you THINK you are done. As I thought I was on Saturday. I heard the playbacks on desktop, laptop, car, and home theatre speakers. They sounded great. Fantastic to my fatigued ears, actually. I almost wrote a great press release proclaiming that the recording was finally completed. I would exhale yet another effervescent breath and move on to other things.

Then I listened again Sunday. And since Sunday I’ve been eq’ing and compressing (tastefully) until the damn thing sounds right. The problem with the initial finished product is that it was too hot, too harsh and sounded `narrow.’

In other words, it sounds like every other professionally recorded album out there right now.

You know that glossy sheen you hear on your favourite songs that make your ears tired and you can’t listen to an entire album straight through? That’s mastering.

That other devil within Mastering is its capability to make something unnaturally loud without distorting that much. This realisation started the great LOUDNESS WARS of the 90’s which continues today. Record labels, and now bands, think that in order to compete on the radio and your mp3 player, they have to be louder than the next recording. The problem this causes is that when a well mastered recording with a respectable volume is played against a hard mastered song, that well mastered recording does indeed sound weak. Our stupid ears respond to intervallic relationships, not on actual sound.

After a good 10 years of listening to recordings that are very hot, I am conditioned to make it very loud and hot as well. It’s an ugly practice contributing to the decline of this art. Fortunately, you can get the best of both worlds (volume, sheen, and tasteful) but it takes a bit of work to do. I have 3 songs I am very happy with so far. Only 3 to go. They should be finished tonight.

I broke a toe. (So I am told)

I take this as a tell-tale sign that I am close to completion of this record. Nothing ever gets completed without some ridiculous unforeseeable incident. Take `Smoke and Origination’ as an example: I lost the whole album (and Torched Laughter, and the metal project) while mixing. The exception was `Lucifer Rising.’ That was because the guiding hand of Satan took care of me.

Thankfully, this toe doesn’t interfere with my hands or my ears. Nice try karma, better luck next time. I am used to your petty games. I know you put pin holes in the cosmic condom.

Moving right along:

The first step in this adventure of suck called MIXING is equalizing the upright bass.

The bass is the foundation of the music. Once I figure out how I can make sound as good as possible, it will make adding all the other instruments much easier.

Since taking a 10 minute break from writing this particular entry, I found the right sound of the bass. If I didn’t take that break, there would have been some mighty mean cussing in this blog. (It’s early yet)

I took a moment today to think about why I really despise the mixing process and frustrated at times with recording in general:

It stems from years of dealing with over-analytical technophiles who made anything and everything sound complicated. As a youth I would ask silly questions like `how do you get a guitar to sound really heavy without being mushy and sounding lifeless?’*

The answer would be a 6 paragraph manifesto regarding the impossibility of achieving said sound with gear that doesn’t cost in excess of 200,000 US dollars. At the end of this smarmy speech they would brag about the mixing board they owned that was once used for a rehearsal for Mahavishnu Orchestra back in 1972. (Before Jan Hammer & Billy Cobham left the band and sold out MAAAAN)

I say `they’ because there are several variations of the same answer from different experienced engineers I dealt with in the past. Some used Mahavishnu Orchestra as the claim to fame, some used Tool or Aerosmith. They made everything sound impossible.

While I sit here and play with equalization I can feel their fucking hockey haired smugness dripping acidic breath on my shoulders. If I was still in contact with them, they would be sending me the schematic of a kinetophone with the word FAIL going across it via e-mail.

Sorry, I couldn’t find the schematic.

This is by no means an affront to experienced engineers. Just addressing the rubbish that had no semblance of positivism, ingenuity or encouragement for those who were curious about the fundamentals of sound. If more guys were like Bob Katz, perhaps music and audio these days would be a much better creature.

Anyway, let’s see what Day 2 brings.

*Turn the gain down. Add mid range. Play around. Done.

Instead of talking about how mixing is going, please see the below picture.

Driftwood discovered on one of the many country sideroads in the area. It was removed from said sideroad and now resides `a little closer’ to my home. No sense having this little piece of nature go to waste on the edge of some drunk’s property.

This alien hydra head thingy is about 4 1/2 feet tall and about 100 lbs. It’s natural weight falls horizontally so I had to prop the driftwood in its current vertical position.

I’m letting it stand where it is for now, but I do have this urge to spray paint it black.

Mixing is going fine. I am clicking, panning, inserting, and patching with much fervour.

Songs can be a search for self. They are powerful analogies that reveal parts of your personality all from the safety of your home or crack den. Fight or flight? Interacting with others? Your natural reactions to these situations can be made apparent just by singing a certain song even if you don’t immediately experience them in real life.

Though experience and emotions imbue life into songs, I see no point on focusing on this well discussed aspect. The songs can be the teacher instead.

  (continue reading…)

The reason I haven’t posted anything in the past few weeks is because things have been downright slow and negative. With all that bad energy floating about I get very unmotivated to do certain things, like posting a blog entry. It’s much easier to seethe and let my intolerance ferment into sweet hateful ether.

Despite all the `Torched Laughter’ tracks being completed last month, I’m still recording vocals for other projects. I was to finish everything by March 29th, but that didn’t happen. By the 29th I finished one song (not related to `Torched Laughter.’)

1 out of 15.

If there is a positive way to look at this stat, please let me know. Because I am quite at a loss.

I do know why I didn’t finish the recordings in the allotted time frame. Cue bullet points:

* Intimidated by the workload. It’s not a matter of just recording one track and then going to the next song. At times there are 10-12 vocal tracks to do for a song (making those big fake choruses.) I don’t have the blow to motivate me to pull off 12 hour days of singing the same `OOOH’ 144 times in a row. (I wish I could though) Which cleverly ties into:

* Creating a level of standard that might not be unattainable. By doing this, I can safely self-sabotage anything I do and not feel any guilt or pressure to meet a deadline. It is a passive-aggressive trait that has done more damage to my person than I want to admit.

In this case, it was the following rule: SING THE WHOLE SONG. Do not record one line at a time. Record the entire song. I am unqualified to pull this off. But I insisted on doing it this way. Something to do with pride, arrogance, etc. This alone set things back several weeks. The good aspect is that I can do it now under certain circumstances and the vocals are genuine and not patchwork. But the price was a lot of time and exhausting to the voice from overdoing it.

* Not staying positive. In order to even attempt what was laid out in bullet point #2, I had to warm up twice a day for 2 hours. Many a day those warm-ups were a waste of time because the recording process later in the evening was just terrible. The voice was there, the mind and heart weren’t. The intimidation and all the pressure I have thrown on myself were knocking me out of whack. Why did I put myself under these conditions when I knew I wasn’t up for it?

Because my heroes could do it well and do it quickly. I want to be as good as them. Obviously I am not. If they had an inkling of care, they would be sneering down at me from their cocaine castles. Provided they weren’t so dead and all.

Even worse were the days when the mind and heart were there, and the voice wasn’t. Which bleeds into:

* No sleep. I won’t go into detail about this. But if you don’t get rest, the voice suffers greatly. Smoke, drink formaldehyde, lick unhygenic prostitutes, but make sure you get rest. I don’t get much rest.

* Finding my voice. This will be the next entry.

Saturday started off rough. I don’t know if it’s because of the winter storms, but god damn it was insufferably dry again. Singing anything good took a massive amount of effort. It got extremely frustrating. Like throwing headphones against the wall frustrating. (Thank you Sony, for making durable cans for us divas)

Began the vocals on Thursday for a song called `Jaw Filled Wreckage.’ I completed about a 3rd of what was needed. The fatigue on my voice was no longer endearing so I needed to stop. The work done on `The Tilted Figure’ did half of the damage. The other half is not sleeping.

I write this on a Friday night nursing honey tea and listening to Cinematic Orchestra. I am not speaking and plan to head to bed early. Drunk fights and dramabombs are the last thing I need right now. Saturday will be ambitious: Sing 3 out of the 4 remaining songs. I need these to be done. I have something to prove to myself. I would like to do all 4, but one needs a big lyrical overhaul.

“Jaw Filled Wreckage” is a variation based on another song from the CD `Smoke and Origination’ called ‘Sharp Knives.‘ The former was the first one written for `Torched Laughter.’ It’s social commentary mixed in with the abstract. The title of the song was inspired by William Burrough’s phrase `Language Is A Virus’ (also a song by Laurie Anderson.) This term describes how certain sayings and words are picked up by other people and employed in their daily lives ad infinitum. Just like a virus, it replicates and mutates until everyone knows and uses some variant of them.

In other words, your fucking W00t is HIV.

The title `Jaw Filled Wreckage’ doesn’t imply a viral cornucopia of snappy sayings. It refers mostly to the mindless inane babble that we house in our mouths (or even our hands;) so desperate to deposit it onto another hapless victim: Filthy linguistic waste.

The title also refers to horrific teeth dreams.

Last night’s work was infinitely better than Tuesday. I hope Tuesday has lungs, so it can get a lung infection and drown in its own Tuesday mucous.

Fuck this night. It’s midnight and I’m not feeling the way I should in order to sing. The voice sounds wrong, the emotional flow is dry. The poor annunciation of consonants make me want to punch my mouth. Everything takes too much effort. I’m psyched out and tired.

I know when it’s time to just call it a day and go to sleep furious. These shit days are as common as hydrogen molecules when it comes to doing vocals. You may see a lot of these type of posts in the coming days. I have not just the 6 songs to sing for `Torched Laughter’ but another 16 songs of the metallic persuasion to do. 22 or so to do this month.

I’m certainly not seeking empathy. No one forced me to do this. But as a goal-obsessed alpha-thing, I get severly bent when things go awry.

I could simply vent and then go back at it, but I won’t.

I learned my lesson with a song called `Sunday Is Falling Apart.’ Which can be listened to and bought at www.cdbaby.com/christophermusic . It’s on `Smoke and Origination.’ For you see, dear reader, I was in this same situation then. Except, I kept going. After 11 hours and 267 takes later, I got enough down that I could splice together a good track. Not a single good track, but many bad tracks with some good spots.

Many months later after the album was done I decided to have a go at that track again: One take. Perfect. 

The song I’m currently working on is called `The Tilted Figure.’ I’ll write more about it tomorrow provided that I sing competently.

I mentioned the song `Inuktorviit’ in the Day 4 Diary. By my humble estimation, the tracking for this song is now complete thanks to the vocal tracks being done last evening. The Neumann TLM 103 microphone is fantastic. Flat response, no weird coloration. I compared it against the vocal microphone I own (an Apex 450.) Though the differences aren’t vastly different when laying down the raw tracks, the gap between Nuemann’s response and the Apex’s affinity for sucking will exponentially get wider when they are processed and mixed.As a recap, `Inuktorviit’ is a type of inukshuk that warns travellers of a very evil place, person or thing. A devourer of souls. The song has only a cursory relationship with the Arctic and the native Inuits. At this point in time it’s just a working title. Probably the 4th working title for this song. The other titles were really imaginative like `Song 4′ and `The Acoustic Song.’My memory is a bit foggy on this song at the moment. I think it was inspired by the wind you feel after the Great Thaw. The arctic chill is no longer present in the air, you close your eyes and enjoy the warm air on your arms. Your loving mate tears off your lips.

So I had the week off from recording. But possible setbacks were prevalent as per usual.Who would think that a microphone rental would be such a dramatic headache?The vocal microphone rental was not going according to plan. There was not a single Neumann TLM 103 in all of the GTA region for rent from Long and McQuade. The last one was held hostage by a Long and McQuade rep who was planning on buying it anyway. But I always have a plan B. And a plan C. And a Plan D. Each plan is more expensive than the former. My solutions are akin to western government. I should run for office. You should run for your lives.So, if no TLM 103, what else can I get?

I am going to assume for now that Day 40 was Saturday. At a later time I’ll figure out the right day.I have a week off from recording `Torched Laughter.’ I have to get my voice in shape for the vocal tracks for Torched as well as the Metal Project thingy. Lastly I’m waiting on a particular vocal mic which is so popular that I have no choice but to wait until one is made available: The Neumann TLM-103. The current mic I own is quite emasculating in nature. I think it’s a great mic if you are going for a `London Trip Hop’ sound because it’s so mid-rangy. But the second you get aggressive or sing baritone the mic strips the power and resonance away. It wants you to behave, be sensitive and be correct. It’s like a liberal arts college.Saturday I returned the AKG C1000’s. The price Long and McQuade offered to sell them for wasn’t worth it. The positive side is that I now know what mics to invest in moving forward.